Ready, Set, XXX-MAS/Coitukah/Kamazaa!!!!

Well, here it is – ’tis the season once again. The air is a chilly like a lady with no willy and there are lists and plans aplenty to be made. Here’s what I’ve got goin’ on so far:

1.) Slip an especially dirrrty remix of ‘Santa Baby’ into the looping snoozfestival that is the office ‘Holiday Soundtrack’. (Priority #1!)
2.) Plan a Pornament Party with the gals; inspired by this lovely ‘piece’ of work on etsy by madame Silletto . And hey, who needs to roast chestnuts when you can cast, mold, and hang them in ribboned glory about the house for your inlaws? EnvironMolds has a great how-to articles and shopping links. Seeing as how there is a definite lack of dick menorahs on the market – me ‘n the ladies may have to make our own.
3.) Cook up some Sugar and Spice for my boys on lists ‘Naughty’ and ‘Nice’. For the trolls of old, perhaps The Ultimate Guide to Cunnilingus by Violet Blue would make an excellent Kwanzaa Zawadi. Or better yet, for the rrreally old ex, perhaps this man girdle is order. But for Mister(s) Nice, Tim Butler at askmen.com has put together a titillatingly tantalizing list of Christmas Sex Positions; the elfin frolicking with helium sounds like an especially uproarious time.
4.) Gear up for the Candy Rain Magazine New Year’s party!! Details to come soon!

The count down has begun, Ladies!

Til Next Time – Rubbin’ Out
xxLyla DurdeNxx
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November 30, 2009. cunnilingus, man girdle, party, pornament, sex positions. Leave a comment.

Snuggie Wuggie Was a Bear

Oh the Snuggie – cherished friend and familiar. When you’ve mistaken the fog in the air for the 8 AM fog in your brain and trek to work one pair of leggings too short – The Office Snuggie is there for you. When you are 2 days in to your monthly rendevous with Aunt Flow, watching Too Wong Foo know full well that inhaling your pint of B&J Phish Food is a very bad idea – The Couch Snuggie doesn’t judge you…in fact he toasts your bloated toes. Now ladies, allow your heart of hearts to skip with glee as I share with you a revelation – The Bedroom Snuggie! That’s right, pick off the leaves and the dog hair (and explain to your roomates that the Couch Snuggie will be indefinately M.I.A.) ‘cuz this Snuggie’s goin’ DownTown! Follow our friends at the Snuggie Sutra for great tips and tricks on how to bring your Snuggie in on the threesome. My personal favorite is the ‘Superwoman’, the caption reads, “She wears the Snuggie on her back. He holds the other end in his teeth. You are super if you can hold yourself up and keep him quiet at the same time.” BAH BAAAM!
Til Next Time – Rubbin’ Out
xxLyla DurdeNxx

November 18, 2009. kama sutra, sex positions, snuggies. Leave a comment.