WOrk IT OuT, Get IT IN, LeT the GIviNg BEGIN!

Oh good sweet Cuddle Puddle ladies!!! Anya, this rock* solid suprah* bada* ss* chica that performed this good ole’ little splitsey-hoo at our last Candy Rain party (and gots this baby thug in the bottom left corner in awe of the AWEsome POWaHssssssssssss of WOOman!!), Needs our HELP! House of Yes, the oddity of outrageous glory, standby staple of cheeky fantasy in the B*rookLawn[vietnam] commmuniTee, is in need of sponsors. And hey lad*es, havin’ this act thowin’ down with the CandyRa*n RainBows & Unicorn Shockers NYE@BeautyBar Brooklyn sounds pretty sweet – Check out the goodies that come along with MESSIAH status (and scope the amazing precursor email ;)>~~~~:
“Begin forwarded message:


From: anya@rock*solid suprah*bad*ss*chica <http://www.houseofyes.org/support>
To: ligerbeat@gmail.com
Subject: Hey Lady!!!

My boyfriend was pretty blown away by the chains action at that crazy party the other night.

you have a mad loud voice. is there any place you could plug our online fundraiser drive?? pretty please? i’ll get half naked and climb a chain for you for life!

xoxo

-anya
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To the ones we love,

Over the past year and a half we have accomplished the impossible. Starting at a disadvantage of having nothing due to a completely destructive four alarm fire in April 2008, we then set out to renovate a raw building with limited resources. After shedding blood, sweat and tears we miraculously finished construction ahead of schedule in December 2008. Dozens of people have put into making the House of Yes the vibrant place it is today, and with your support we will grow even stronger.

We are in urgent need of raising $17,000 by December 12th, 2009.
For details on the fundraiser and to donate see: http://www.houseofyes.org/support/

With sold-out shows, constant rehearsals and events happening six days a week, the House of Yes fills a crucial role in a community of hundreds. The facilities at Yes simply don’t exist anywhere else in a way that is financially accessible to such a large and varied community. In order to survive and continue to expand to serve the community better, we are looking to raise new capital to complete urgent improvements and to ensure the financial stability of the space. Every week dozens of artists, workers and performers donate dozens of hours it all going. It’s a labor of love. Giving up, or losing momentum is not in our vocabulary. We know we can do this, but we desperately need your help.

Because your support means so much to us, we have put together some great “Thank You” packages for everyone who donates. All donations are tax deductible, as we are sponsored by a 501c3 not for profit Artistic Evolution. If you are unable to give you can still help us tremendously by spreading the word about the House of Yes and everything that happens here to anyone who might help in any way.

There are four levels of support. Choose the one that fits you best:

Be a Messiah…
…donate $1,000 to ensure our survival.

All Messiah level donors get:

  • A Rockstar Night with the Lady Circus! The ladies of Lady Circus will pick you up in a stretch limousine (donated for the night by Stan the Limo Man) to travel to North East Kingdom in Brooklyn for a free dinner and drinks, then to Carnival NYC for comped entry, two bottles of vodka (the good stuff) and rockstar treatment by the carnival performers, the ladies of Lady Circus the creators of TheDanger.com and other all-stars. This will be a night to remember (unless you hit the vodka too hard.)
  • Free VIP Admission to all House of Yes event for EVER! Anytime we are hosting a party or performance, your name will be on the list. Skip the line and pay nothing to everything hosted at the house for the rest of your natural life.
  • A big thank you with your name (or your company/organization name) on our website. We will show how much we appreciate your support in the most public way possible.
  • A Signed House of Yes T-Shirt. They look rad.


Be a Super-Hero…
…donate $500 to help improve the space.

All Super-Hero level donors get:

  • Free VIP Admission to all House of Yes event for a YEAR! Anytime we are hosting a party or performance, your name will be on the list. Skip the line and pay nothing to everything hosted at the house for one entire year!
  • A big thank you with your name (or your company/organization name) on our website. We will show how much we appreciate your support in the most public way possible.
  • A Signed House of Yes T-Shirt. You are too cute NOT to have one of these shirts.


Be a RockStar…
…donate $100 so we can keep the lights on.

All Rockstar level donors get:

  • Free VIP Admission to all House of Yes events through New Years Eve! Come FREE to our Christmas Spectacular, No Parking on the Dance Floor, or any of the dozen shows we have scheduled through the end of the year.
  • Four comped entries to TheDanger’s New Years Eve party! Two spaces, a dozen dj’s, performances by the Lady Circus and more all for free for you and four friends.
  • A big thank you with your name (or your company/organization name) on our website. We will show how much we appreciate your support in the most public way possible.
  • A Signed House of Yes T-Shirt. All the cool kids are wearing them. Where is yours?


Be Awesome
…donate $20 so we can make it till’ next week.

All Awesome level donors get:

  • A big thank you with your name (or your company/organization name) on our website. We will show how much we appreciate your support in the most public way possible.
  • A House of Yes T-Shirt This shirt is worth like $85. You actually make a profit on this deal.
  • You get two entries into our Christmas Spectacular drawing. We will be hosting an award drawing with two dozen amazing gifts at the close of our Christmas Spectacular Show: Saturday, December 12th. Gifts include: a Rockstart Night with the Lady Circus, free Yoga Classes, fine-art prints, comped entrance to many different parties and more!

Please, donate here: https://www.paypal.com/cgi-bin/webscr?cmd=_s-xclick&hosted_button_id=9973076

Thank you sincerely for your support. Without you, none of this would be possible.”

Til‘ Next Time – Rubbin’ Out

xxLylaDurdeNxx

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December 11, 2009. benefit, candy rain, charity, feminist porn, house of yes. Leave a comment.

Cuddle Puddle Breakdown

It was Friday the 13th, and the early New York skyline looked as though it would live up to the date’s incorrigible dogma. But for the women who were in the know, the skies could only be ‘rainin’ men’ at Liger Beat’s official unveiling of its new moniker, Candy Rain.

From the ‘burg over to the ‘slope, and from the ‘heights down to the ‘stuy, all of Brooklyn came to represent and give sugary kisses to the Candy Rain Girls. The night warmed up with a bang as the first guest gladly whipped out his Johnson for the camera. And he wasn’t the first dashing dude to take advantage of Candy Rain’s signature recession buster: A dick pic trade for free cover. We collected over 100 shots of longs, skinnies, balonie ponies and leaner wieners for your viewing pleasure my fair ladies. All to be seen in our upcoming issues of course (*winks*). Though yours truly was on ‘pep talk the CoverDood Contestants’ duty for most of the first bands, I couldn’t resist but to get my mini mosh on for Womb Ripper’s wicked set. But I must say my fan fave of the night was for sure Plush & Harmony’s sweet rendition of ‘Candy’. Replete with butterscotches and dum dums on stage (which shortly thereafter fell victim to the mouths of hungry women devoid of a 5-second rule); Felicia Plush rose majestically to the stage in a pantsless shocking pink sequined leotard that would make even GaGa writhe with jealousy while Reginald Harmony strummed to his lady’s cooing in the hawtest pair of bronze hot pants this side of Germany. It was sexilicious, and a great limbering up for the event of the evening – the Candy Rain CoverDood Contest.

Reining over the proceedings in a vintage Laura Ashley masterpiece was Madame Calisha Jenkins, who corralled the first round of hotties before their lady judges (dusty white wigs included!). The first horse out of the gate (or boxers rather) was our boy from Hood Ink – never makin’ the ladies wait for the main attraction. The obvious dry ups were shooed away quickly after a few seconds of ‘I’m sooo not with that guy’ dance moves, leaving a tasty harvest behind. The team work was on point in Round Two, with the boy’s hot body pyramid coming in a very close second to the beauty with the magic hands – Ladies, this man got a condom on a banana in under 5 seconds flat! Now that’s a talent you can bring to the bank. The crowd was becoming tangibly titillated as the rest of the ponies came out to play. A few unsuccessful stage dives (“b*tch I ain’ catchin’ your drunk ass!”) and sexy pull ups later we were on to the Feats of Strength: a pantsless airplane ride for our three lucky volunteers. The competition was fierce as it came down to only two – the Pretty boy and our boy at Hood Ink. Though Pretty was looking to be the for sure winner, he booooombed at the final test. Ladies we asked this dood, “How do you know she came?” and the subsequent “Uuuuugghhh” was seriously stoppin’ up the waterworks, that’s until Hood Ink came to the rescue with the perfect answer: “I know she came when I can feel it in my mouth!” Bah BAAAM! And the saucy Spaniard took the trophy and our wet dream. Look forward to his cover shoot featuring guns and black lights and check out his amazing glowy tats. And now if you’re wondering what the major malfunction was with the runner up, I got it on the up and up from my beautiful GBFF, Caramel Blondé, that the babe was definitely not knockin’ boots with any cowgirls if you know what I mean (alls the better for us that our stallion was straight). Turning around from the contest, we were greeted by a rad æon-esque aerial performance – with the one and only Lady Circus suspended in the air over us by a metal link chain. The rest of the evening was for the Dance-a-holics and our boy DirtyFinger on the tables was tearin’ it up. If you missed it, you’re certainly a sorry suckah – but no worries my fair, we’ll be back at cha before you can say sweet dick!

Til Next Time – Rubbin’ Out

xxLyla DurdeNxx

November 17, 2009. 171 lombardy, benefit, Brooklyn, candy rain, coverdood, dick pics, dirty finger, fundraiser, hood ink, Liger Beat, loft party, plush n harmony, porn, pornography, tattoos, womb ripper. Leave a comment.