Dudes Who Fell the Fuck Off: Val Kilmer

Poor, poor Val Kilmer. I understand how fucked up it is when papz catch you just having finished a whole pizza pie to yourself, quietly enjoying a Bud (Light), just trying to catch a moment of solace. WELL TOO BAD FATTY. Seriously, this is worse than Cary Elwes. You played Jim Morrison! You were the Iceman in Top Gun! Fuck it, you were Batman! How you gonna go from Batman to Fatman? Bruce Wayne to Bruce Plain? Apparently he’s planning to run for senate, which it seems is the field you fall into when your acting career is pretty much deaded. Makes sense. Anyways, I’m being hard ol’ Vally Kils cause I care. Seriously. You live in New Mexico. Cop your ass a tan. Grow a beard. Do something. It’s 2009 for fucks sake, and if Obama can ask a nation for change, so can I ask you, Val Kilmer, please change. Its for the best.

February 10, 2009. celebrity crushes, dudes who fell the fuck off.

One Comment

  1. claire replied:

    he was at carytown burgers last week. ahahahaha

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